Should I’ve killed myself because I’m Autistic?

Fuck this b!tch! Click on More to read the TL;DR comment I left on that Fraud on Broad St from another YT video. I used to podcast The Weekly Zoo that was hot mess of different talk shows with a raunchy tone.

I don’t want to drone in comments about “NT” and “Aspies” but I am someone with PDD-NOS (as of 2019 it’s antiquated) and I used to know AND worked with Teresa Bolick*, and I am struggling TO THIS DAY in Southern New Hampshire socially. This region screams rich Caucasian people who tend to not respect people whose social skills aren’t perfect for the 21st Century; of which Teresa was. If you’re someone who is triggered by the videos of my channel I post; I think she would be the first person to blame for lack of self control. I don’t have any friends, and all NON-family relationships are static “acquaintances” (or in Teresa Bolick Speak “familiar face”) ONLY to feel “safe” to prevent freakouts by the ‘Typicals. I have to have an internal filter (of which she never seemed to have as it’s outlined in this package below) and just trying to process these complex stuff (that was done way out of line) has made me more psychotic than being sane. 10 years out of high school – oh wait 11, and I am still struggling. I’m this close to leaving my state and live in some hill (because I can’t afford to live on top of a mtn) and totally be a hermit – because of people LIKE HER. * TL;DR? I knew that (now deceased) woman for 18 of my first 21st years. We crossed paths as she had consulted in the state-assigned School Admin. Units (SAU) I attended. I’ll “ditto” her for the rest of my comment. She became my therapist/psychologist from 2000 to 2008. I fired her just after my 21st birthday after coincidentally I figured out she had broken me. I had several on and off again sessions till I finally gave up in 2010 when she continue to manipulate me like a 10 year old. BTW: This individual also gave me the PDD-NOS diagnosis; and told me about the condition nearly 5 years after that (1994) in the worst time in my life personally. (Like being told a label would fix anything after what would become a PTSD situation forever.) Worse the STEREOTYPE, the STIGMA and every TEXTBOOK example of PDDNOS equaling to hopelessness, imagine a “doctor” making one more sicker than healthier.  If this video is from 2009/2010 right at 1:00 mark, I can tell I had some influence. I think the firing of her (WITH knowing her for 18 years) made her humble-up. She also had the audacity to tell me and my mother “of the thirty years of being in this field, I just got the grasp of autism”. So from prior to 2009, I was apparently experimented on. Very ethical, oh wait mental health industries don’t have ethics or Bolick was so arrogant she didn’t really care! I was at that point so shocked from that comment, I couldn’t do a damn thing other than years later wishing I could rip her university certificates and her license right in her face, perhaps shove her to a wall at her Nashua office because many of her actions had eternally broke me.  2:26, she’s damn right too. She’s not from New Hampshire or Mass ether! She was ex No Carolinian far left zealot who worked with mostly boys, and didn’t like their differences and used her power a BCBA to turn them into girly manners, (confession of a crime at 4:00.) And the blatant double standards of a typical white woman at 8:10 could get away with the statements. She worked with males, but had a vendetta against them. Isn’t that a conflict of interest? She sure as heck cut my penis to make me feel like a girl after her abuse she did to me. She lived in Middlesex County, Massachusetts while practicing psychology in my state of New Hampshire. Unlike her, I have paid taxes, obtained a non-drivers license, and was a resident more than she ever was. For some strange reason; the State of New Hampshire has no ethics laws, so she had her network get her into blue-ribbon panel of the New Hampshire Council on ASD, without any checks that this woman was out of state. That should be a blatant crime. It makes me sick that she died some rare disease in 2017, and yet she had 1,000 friends who followed her like Jesus Christ. She was beyond a saint in the spectrum of evil. She preached more than she ever learned. And it was 1970s standards. I won’t repeat lack of ethics; it’s well known the people worshipped had a woman-crush (3:40 in); goddamned “mama bears”, or worked in the industry or what. But let me say, I was probably the only one who was really happy that this voice finally disappeared, but sadly there is 1,000 more people in the bullpen to broadcast FUD to other families of autistics – or worse to quote Bolick “the individuals themselves”. This godless, liberal, far left zealot, MISANDERIST, anti-autism, acting as a “god” to “fix” me and my group of people – at least for one of her ex-clients FAILED miserably and obviously backfired. This b—-h is the reason why I don’t have many friends, and I am still in 2019 paranoid when I am out in public or even online just having to do a self check-list EVERY! SINGLE! TIME!  I sometimes wished I killed myself when Bolick had my case. I pray every morning ensuring this fraud is in hell, and there always be a special place in hell when Mental Health Professionals abuse their power over charisma and Southern Charm to make people like me – MORE HOPELESS. I’ve rested my case; it’s important to have three sides of an individual like Teresa. Just a disgusting individual, makes me want to vomit my breakfast right now. I could be all wrong, I could be delusional; because I was implied that I was always right. But maybe Bolick was on the spectrum too. That’d explain a lot.

2 thoughts on “Should I’ve killed myself because I’m Autistic?

  1. Pingback: Narcissistic People with ANY AGE and ANY TYPE are DANGEROUS! | The Alleged, Hopeless & Outspoken Autistic

  2. Pingback: “Community Based Supports” and a Millennial autistic abandoned by said “Community” | A Hopeless "Autistic" in The 603

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