Basically here’s a brief timeline of my autism disorder (or disease)
- I didn’t start talking till I was about 4
- I struggled through my middle school years (and left the school district within a couple months)
- I had gotten severely agressive from when I was 12 to before 18 (which I don’t know what causes it for everyone on the spectrum, but disturbing even to this day)
- I described myself as being 3 years behind most peers, up till when I turned 21 and fell off the cliff,
- The last 3 years was the worst years of my life however,
- I moved to a new town for the first time ever in my life in the last year in and a happier area if I can try to get out and stay in this region
Even with the happier news of my life, there is still some bumpy roads. I seem to be “regressing” since finishing school, to the point where I am getting agressive again. People close to me are concerned, and they should feel that way. I don’t know why I would be so angry…oh wait – because I have had a difficult life!
I feel I have other disorders lumped into my existing disorder, but I don’t know if I am really on the spectrum or not. How can the disorder be so different for everyone that has it? I feel sometimes creeped out in my own skin, and rightfully so. It’s like how can you be developmentally behind, but yet freak out like you should be put into a mental institution and also be somewhat smart?
That’s what I think about on an often basis, how can someone on the autism spectrum have a whole range of problems mixed into one individual?
Its never more confusing to struggle with this disorder/disease in these crazy times.
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