Tag Archives: Masculinity

Conservatism – is it a threat to people like me?

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Society has gone through series of directions overtime. If you heard lately “we should go back to the 1950s”, what they really mean was the 1950s the last well known time period, as the the man being the bread winner, women stayed in the kitchen, and a push for christian values, with heterosexual marriage and procreation, for the elder man’s own narcissistic legacy. Did I say this so called American Dream or “American”, “nuclear family” was only acclaible to Caucasian people?

They imply turning back to this time, because it predates the 1960s, the decade of that lead to civil rights, the invention of birth control, and the rise of feminism, and its various “waves”. But if you get your news from Just Pearly Things, a YouTuber of over a million subscribers; who is now selling merch that “Women Shouldn’t Vote” and is completely clueless to Putin and his extermination towards unorthodox conservatives… if you never heard of her, then you’re missing out on why this nostalgia should be fought against.

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Why are Typical Men Regressing to the 1000s?

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In the ongoing series of Men Scare Me, I wanted to dig deep and figure out why men have become primitive in the last few years? In the dangerous rise of man-o-spheres and alpha males defending in the range of overcompensating, it makes me wonder what the hell happened. I see correlation of men mixed with narcissistic fingerprints, and an obsession to family values, that is creepy in nature and not just autistic children, but now anyone.

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The Traumatic Experience of a Clustereff Family (Enmeshment)

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In 2019, I met some of my paternal family members, about a year after they found me on Facebook, two of the aunts. My father had never told the family about me, like my two half siblings of which he never spoke to them. May I say the sisters are closer to my age. As a result the oldest sister was under the impression that she was the oldest child and therefore gawd forbid your’s truly apparently knocked her off the pedestal in a March 2019 post of the reunion; but I had the class to use the hashtag #firstgrandchild because it was a) a fact and b) that sister is the first granddaughter, so WTF, right?

I realized that my paternal grandmother was this close to cheating death with a rare cancer. The family waited to an autistic blow up of yours truly (that if they would be open to say in the first place), that sign #1 was that they don’t see age in the grandchildren. The youngest grandchild is close to 16, while I’m the oldest (35.) The boundaries are, don’t tell the literal “children” about her condition, not even a yea or nay or any one liner at all. Maybe that’s a thing between us – the hierarchal children – and my paternal grandmother. This is the problem, selective boundaries to enhance control.

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F-ck Father’s Day: You Oughta Know! (Karaoke style)

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Every year on Father’s Day, I sing the song to Alanis Morrisette’s You Oughta Know. Because my raw emotions of recent discovery that not only my father not only denied creating me at conception or after birth, but had the audacity to get away trying to burry the body in the closet to my two half siblings who didn’t know I even existed until something hit their Facebook activities in March of 2019 – that was me! Not only that I took the flack for over a year making the mistake of sharing and tagging to only realize, why am I blaming myself? My father should’ve known better!

I was cheated on! He was a 19 year old young man who was such a chauvinistic  dick, that when the moment he had to be a “man” he went into the fucking fetal position and denied, deflect, and defend he did nuttin! This so-called “man” really acted like a pussy, excuse me while I use such vulgarities WITHOUT pride and self gratification! 

He rather see me dead! But hell, he’s buddies with all the female cousins and apparently the sisters too. Maybe he’d respect the existence if I was born a female?

I will never call him a “dad” – he denies the existence of this individual, but why do some members of the family expect that I should respect a man who pisses on masculinity?

I HATE HIM. FROM CONCEPTION, TO BIRTH, FROM WOMB TO THE TOMB. THIS MAN WAS A DICK, IS A DICK, AND WILL DIE AS ONE TOO! 

Father’s Day can suck my dick, and gag on it!