Why and When to Give Up (from being a Hopeful Autistic)

What you’re about to read is something that will likely be shocking and probably very sad. But what lead me into checking-out of society, and the relapse of being undervalued, under-respected has everything to do with ablest-ic tendencies that started in the new millennia. These experts with Masters or worse Doctors knowing everything about ASD has now hit a new level, a confirmable point of fact that there really is no hope; because I went through this from 2014 into 2020, that it’s likely going to happen yet again. I wished this was a work of fiction… but my experiences is so exceptional, that I feel even guilty admitting this!

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The Tolerance vs. Acceptance Crowds

I thought living in Londonderry was bad until I moved more than 11 years ago. I now live in Merrimack, a larger populated town, and more square mileage than the former. While Londonderry had been traditionally conservative, it was quasi conservative, but not ultra conservative like here. I realized while “Ltown” (as the former Millennial aged residence would say) lacked tolerance (as I if I was not to exist); Merrimack on the other hand, has one thing going forward, tolerating my group. But it’s far from sexy.

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Why are Men Not Speaking Up in Re to Roe v. Wade? (Hint… fear!)

I’ve seen this Tweet recently…

I brought up this individual a couple times on my old podcast The Weekly Zoo (which was a ratings fail of all fails – you can still check out the archives) later tried to get this feminist that touts that she “loves men” to comment via my minifig newsgathering account (the new endeavor as I pivot in my off time), to no avail.


I guess it’s safe to say that she doesn’t mind her handle being hung out with a burning question and not having having empty tags. Not to mention that I produced a 2 part, 2 minute review on the surface of her 296 page book, entitled For The Love of Men, scratching my head (and TBH hating men even more, so her book backfired) for a minifig all news radio station. A lot of the things I wanted to say was scrapped. In fact the above post got a ghost-like from said individual about a day later.  I think she seems to be a cool person when not being put into heated and heavy topics, but your humble writer is too cool for someone like her (given her background with my types of people) and perhaps not-enough.

Enough of any additional personal reax, onto the point in hand: We are scared of potential reax making my group so bad. What can we say that won’t make us shut out? What if you peeps block us on social? I do not agree with much of Matt Gatez (what is it with Florida pols who just do creepy stuff), but if he agrees with this statement: if you have too much education and you have not enough experience to apply in real life, then he could be right. That’s how I define over-educated and I am not in Rep Gatez’ mind so what do I know? I’ve used this phrase years ago and sadly Rep Gatez has abused the spirit of a constructive phrase as a weapon now you sonofabitch!

I cannot tell you how many bad experiences with toxic masculine tendencies of feminist types that had 4 to 8 years of education and what did they do to men, at risk guys, yours truly? Complete writeoffs! It’s like the worst preachers is the one who doesn’t learn new verses.

What do you do if you’re a so-called man-enough type that…

  • was in a relationship with a girlfriend
  • … that you knocked her up
  • … she doesn’t want the fetus
  • but perhaps he wants the child to be the better man?

I know that’s a wild question because how often would this occur? But to not deny the fact an Uber driver could be criminally charged for being an accomplice and some states that don’t see bounties as a problem; or throw the books at the death-penality against the woman that wants an abortion; or the potential ruling leading into severe regressions of other civil rights legal moments, we may sure as hell become a shithole country as former Presidant Trump used to say about a territory!


“Autism Mom”/”Autism Dad”… go bite my dick!

One of the most cringe of all cringe labels is the “Autism [Parent]” identifier. On the same cringe as the #ActuallyAutistic types. (Hell I love to have the secondary brand of a Hopeless Autistic, for sane people it should grab their attention!) The problem is these parents are praised as doing God’s work as parents of children that seem to be separate from normal parents.

Are these people diagnosed with autistic condition from the DSM-V? Why are you using a descriptor of your child’s condition as your identifier of than using a qualifier of that condition. Parent of an autistic child is describing the condition not using the label to identify the person entirely. The holy war of “person with autism” and “autistic” will never end, it’s best to just use both and lay off using “Autism Mom” or “Autism Dad” since that could lead into a Narcissistic Personality Disorder and my gawd is that the last thing we need in this shithole society!

I will never probably fall in love to head into a Relationship to even hope I could have an offspring! Last month was horrible of the lack of awareness to some level of some acceptance!

FFS alive, have some humble pie and tone down your ego. Your autistic child will thank you for it when they become adults!

Am I crazy? No!

Why did I come out in 2022 and say I was The Alleged Autistic? Because I had documented evidence that some of my earlier writings was the basis of putting a lot of mental resources of what I feared was going to happen to me, by 2015, in the Hopeless Autistic. Am I dedicating full resources to write on a daily basis? No!

The writings I am putting together since the initial free WP blog, is more of a how-to of what you should do and kinda learn what not to do from my experience.

I was in very deep drama in 2019, that probably was as bad as when I was in high school, but my elementary years got corrupted too over time. My mother has had the best 24 out of the last 29 years thanks to a lot of praise and standing ovations from my ol IEP team. The idea of raising a child with special needs (or a disabled child to some) shouldn’t require some high level praise, but people do, and the ones who hurt the most are the ones living with it.

Dave Plummer – THE WORST Alleged Autistic!

As someone who had autism at birth, who has legit situations, and was diagnosed with PDD-NOS (not Asperger’s Syndrome the very same year DSM-IV was published), to then be told directly to me five years later…IT WAS A DEATH SENTENCE!

And you have these retards (of which I rarely use that word) who casually uses it as if it’s so common like ADHD. I am talking about Dave Plummer, a hack Microsoftie who claims to have the same autism as you or I have. This guy is cringe upon cringe upon cringe. I am not trying to trash Microsoft as an alleged autistic myself, but he is so clueless at his messaging. And he writes shit code. Why… after using OS X almost entirely a decade as a surface level device (MacBooks, the mini, etc) you kinda don’t miss Windows… here’s his man-splainin about how it’s important to always Restart and Refresh every 3 years…

Not to mention he pimps his Autistic Millionaires. Excuse me while I cringe.

I am not saying he has tendencies, but for FFS alive, be careful what you say or someone (like me) could weaponize this against ya!

2022: Another Chapter…Finding the Malicious Definition of “Feminism”

In the early years of An Alleged Autistic and A Puzzling View, a common thread was feminism, but that was completely a simplistic view (particularly your’s truly with a twentysomething mind), since a lot of my writings was actually under intelligent for what I can write today. In fact this feminism masquerading as female chauvinism from schoolage was the root cause for me to go into hopeless and seeing relationships more puzzling. It took multiple abuses to see through the garbage that was “progressive” education

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2022: Another Chapter…Recovering from Narcissistic Abuse (‘typical Against an Autistic)

In early 2020, in the midst of COVID19, I had taken time off from my 3rd adult day program. Little would I know, this would be the beginning of the end with them. There was several incidents leading to being kicked-out, or worse written-off because I wasn’t disabled-enough. I do not know when my last day of my program was because of the pandemic, it was likely the end of March, because we were last billed for the services, despite having communications with administrative staff in April. (Some would say that was not-professional for any staff to divulge any vulernabilities of the program to a client.)

I say: I don’t give a flying fuck!

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Phase II of the #HopelessAutistic – When it Impacts Me

In my written works of The Hopeless Autistic, I cited the reasons why I felt “hopeless”. That being:

  • They won’t be able to find an ideal, and reasonable day program
  • They won’t be able to find an ideal support staff
  • That they will not be able to have a reasonable and healthy social life
  • And won’t be able to find love

Since the original writings from 2015 to 2017; this has gotten worse. I had been basically let go without warning from my day program in the midst of the pandemic. Support staff is better, and now it’s all 1 on 1 going forward. The social network continued to erode and in fact it wasn’t even strong to begin with, especially with the Facebook-friends. Let’s not even touch love with a 10′ pole, looking back, that was hopeless from the start.

So I was basically right (even though I wanted to be wrong) that in 5 years, the system for individuals with developmentally delayed conditions would get screwed over, and that was pointing to the year 2020. Well COVID19 just distracted all of us. Now that the pandemic is allegedly in a managed situation, the managed care is returning back.

In the next five years, unless a miracle happen (which is slim to none at this point…)

  • Autism or ASD like conditions will continue to not be well known.
  • ASD will not be classified as an “invisible” disability, like it should
  • Ignorance about autism, and arrogance of it’s potential will accelerate
  • Millennials are slowly having children, and they may have an autistic child; but they will be just as clueless as their Boomer parents.
  • The mass ignorance of the general community, and the present lack of strong voices to provide positivity to help people like me to move forward.
  • The biggest fear is I will be written off the books because my disability (despite statistically showing I need a lot of support) because autism is not a physical handicap, and therefore it shouldn’t be funded.  

With my family shrinking, with my social subnet shrinking, no new people are open to me to be part of their life; let’s not even touch the S.O. opportunities at this point, that is clearly Game Over. With the lack of growing, the lack of learning, the lack of forgiveness of others, the lack of general awareness to my group, this is really going to get a HELLUVLA LOT WORSE before it gets even close to “better”.

I was gaslit for saying “the system was on fire” by 2016, and was told the state agency didn’t see it that way. But I saw the cracks and saw the sparks, and now in early 2022, the same thing is coming for my life. I am desperately scrambling for my life of when that dreaded day where I may loose services only because the politics of the dev disabled is only getting worse.

You folks were The First to Know “the system” was on fire in the State of New Hampshire. Hacks like Dan Habib decided to cover it up to instead produce inspiration porn to deceit you. But I am not a filmmaker. I carry an ENG camera and I will continue to speak more assertively in 2022 in the #OutspokenAutistic series of content to wake living fuck of people to understand I could be totally screwed by 2027.