Category Archives: An Alleged/Forgotten Autistic (2011-2013)

Archived stories from An Alleged/The Forgotten Autistic from January 2011 to November 2012

Commentary: Autism is NOT Aspergers

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Asperger Syndrome is NOT autism! Autism is autism. Autism is a spectrum of severity of the disorder and a melting pot of disorders including developmental, neurological, mental and emotional disorders.
Why should Asperger’s be classifed as autism when they are functioning themselves? They can take care of themselves. They can drive, go to college and get a girl without any assistance.
These politics make autism a vague (read: alleged) and growing skeptism of the disorder when it keeps evolving, to use the phrase of the antichrist psychologist community.

Females, part one

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It’s too bad when one autistic (ether if he has autism or Asperger syndrome) has been forced to stay away from them, because they put us in the same group as the “creeps.” This woman-made “love shyness” can be much avoided if they could stop forcing us what we can’t do and tell what we can do with any romances.

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Why I *hate* the University of New Hampshire

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In light of the union hackerama brohaha at the University of New Hampshire, thats getting some hyperlocal media play, I thought I’d write a blurb or two about why UNH not only screws the taxpayers, but the most vulnerable people in this state.
First off, its only funded by the state for less than 2%. Why? Because in New Hampshire, we are known to spend the way of being frugal,  for the kids to get aid, the state puts a minimal amount to their budget. So the rest of the 98% is for other revenues, tuition, alumni, and other crap.
Another problem is the college’s way of not teaching practical skills for some of their practical studies. Most of the UNH kids major in partying than majoring in real subjects. And most of their programs do not apply to their state, i.e. Global Warming, and their globalization agenda – on the taxpayers dime! Also, many come here not from New Hampshire and the native graduates often  never come back to this state. And most of these bastards are from the rich families (i.e. snobs) and they often have an IQ bordering on room temperature regardless what education they previously had.
Oh and did I mention that their Institute on Disability that is a resource to the college for disabilities like autism, that is being taken advantage by the people who are really disabled? That department is for resource for the teaching studies, “professional development” but the resource is never used for the ones who can talk and attempt to learn in a college level.
As I tried to get results with one of the hack from UNH back last May in Bretton Woods, at the Family Support Conference, I told the hack that many people with ASD are turning 21 to find out they will be in limbo because there isn’t anything for them. I should told that guy also that UNH was asleep at the switch for not warning of the tsunami of the autistics turning 21 in the last and the next few years.  They could had done something, but they didn’t.
I hate UNH to death, and I have met only two decent people who went there and didn’t get their minds filled of goo.  One is a far rightie and one is leftist, so theres some true diveristy you don’t often hear at the Institution in Durham.
To partially steal the phrase from Michael Dell, if I ran UNH, I would give the money back to the taxpayers.

Am I autistic or what?

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Autism is an evolving paradyne, to use the latter cliche by the ultra left libs on other issues. 20 years ago, HFA would been defined as Savant Disorder. Then after that earth shattering year in “1994” Asperger’s syndrome trumped Savant’s. Then PDD-NOS and autism went in tandem which now every label in the last decade.
See the problem of suffering with autism, is the label keeps changing because a bunch of far left doctors that dominate the labeling believe in evolution and changing labels with a click of a mouse kinda thing. The problem with these hack doctors that have a doctor in name only or DINO because they have an honorary PhD. in their title and not a medical doctor degree.
They don’t have any problems of the change, and they don’t like to sorta simplify, because that would degrade their overeducated degrees. I did offend people in the past about that.
But what I have a problem with is the ever so changing labels and I can’t keep up with them.
And I AM OFFENDED AS ONE WITH AUTISM that has to get fucked in the middle because someone with PDD/NOS or autism or what else can’t have the freedom as one with Savants or Aspergers, or maybe I just feel so fucking bitter because I don’t know what side i should be on.
I also live close to Middlesex County, Massachusetts, the smartass capital of of the East Coast, where its the largest base of smartasses who have Aspergers and Savants and other rich snots as well.
I know that I can’t be the only low class, “smart” without that piece of paper that feels bitter living in an abutting area of smartasses that aren’t looking out for me.

The stupid excuses of why we can’t be in love

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The bureaucratic teachers will say to one that they aren’t a “dating service” when they know that 99.99% of the class is male. They can’t do anything beyond their job title, even it its less than a dozen responsibilities.
Harassment, and Sexual Harassment is hardwired into us because guess who would be headed to jail first? You guessed it – the ones on the spectrum!
I don’t know why stalking isn’t brought up to be lectured upon, I have read about those alleged “concerns” from the ones that make the spectrum worse than it should be.
The so called experts, (the one’s with those PhD degrees that specializes in just autism) have to break things into pieces so one on the spectrum can understand, in this case relationships. At some point, the pie will be sliced into so many thin slices, that making something understandable would make the problem worse. Again, there is a negative slant, is most cases about what not to, which always seems to the be “important” part.
Then I could go on and explain how most people with ASD cases are often forced to go to a work program from when they are 18 to their 21st birthday. It’s kinda like boot camp where you kiss your childhood goodbye and become a slave in the workforce, and some work programs you have to learn how to become a corporate slut like in the case of my ex-town, by working, working and working and be a whore to the VP just to make a killing salary.
Again just an opinion of someone who has just been screwed by a system that might had made up a disorder just to employ mothers for a full time job.

Why autistic people don’t fall in love.

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Here’s my politically incorrect post about why people on that traditional autism spectrum disorder (ASD) do not fall in love.
Because we are told we can’t.
Well, not literraly. Most people who have high functioning autism (HFA), Asperger Syndrome (AS) or another scam disorder are male, most of them didn’t go to public school and most schools there are all male based (prolly 99% of them are.) And most of the teachers (probably of 90% majority) are female whom of which are under the age of 30 by most cases. Even if they are pretty, we obviously can’t date them. Even if you are a legal adult between the ages of 18 to 21 unfortunately.
We have been hardwired (read: bricked for a lack of a better techno word) about ethics, morals and respect. Also being forced to learn sex harassment and general harassment doesnt help matters because they tell us that  its “the law”
And most of us like older ladies because 99.9% of the girls under the age of 34 are the Gen X/Millennial/MeMeMe generation. They are just as snobby (and dare I say slutty) as their parents of their time. So basically I have never met a bitch I really liked. This isn’t your typical “phase” in ones life, this is worse. My remaining innocence went away when the MySpace, Facebook and other social mediums took over. This opened a window about these peer groups not at all promising.
That’s just a  tip of the iceberg.
I lived in upper class (forget upper middle class) in what was used to be a middle class/middle sized town of New Hampshire just less than 20 years ago. All the rich Andover, Mass. type of people had invaded and raped the entire Southern NH region and brought their booze, their slutty “little girls” and other shit over to our nice little town. Now the town I just left no less than 5 months ago has changed, just like that town changed in less than 2 years. There’s more and more bigger show off SUVs (I don’t have a problem with them, only when its for a show off purposes) in my town as with more condoms on the roadside, more and more beer bottles and more sluts living there.
I’ll refrain from that S-word for the rest of this post.
However, it brings massive substance because I was programmed to be careful with the opposite gender.  I don’t know why, likely the parents have to protect the girls because they are (allegedly) vulnerable in the statical sense. Whatever I’ve heard that reasoning (excuse) of why they are bitches, but protecting them for the safety sense should not the be Number 1 or Number 2 of why they can be bitches.
I do know one girl who really messed me up, but because she’s was that pretty little daddy’s girl, she could get away damaging one of the most vulernable people in the town. (again autistic and a boy – thats fine but the other way around, OMG – SCANDALOUS!!!) I almost forgot she was part of that UNH bubble, a worse target, because those people are even more s***ty, drunk and dare I say DUMB? And I pay a fraction of my tax dollars to fund some of those bitches? Why shut the whole damn place down and give that 2% back to the damned taxpayers?
I’m sorry for bitching and ranting, but obviously as one who has some form of autism (whatever the label is the fashion today) I feel somewhat hurt that I never kissed a girl or ever got into any relationship past an infatuation, but again its the damned hacks from the local teachers union that wants to create a w0man-made disorder just so they can take care of their kids even if they are well of age.
I’ve been getting over the pain, this February 14th wasn’t as painful, as I don’t feel as a hopeless romantic anymore, but a hopeless autistic instead.

Sometimes I question…

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How real my autism is
Why did I not do things I was capable of doing, but conciousnly chose to weasel out
Why did I learn to drive at 16
Why I did not graduate high school at 18 and not my 21st birthday
Why I didn’t get passed the closed-minded New Hampshire hacks and just went to college and showed them who was the real boss of someone WITH autism
Could living with Ass-perger’s Syndrome could have been a better label instead of “PDD-NOS”?
Just a few questions I ask myself with one being hopeless, helpless and sleepless of one whose loosing his faith of the whole ever-so-growing woman-made-scam known as autism

What is my disorder?

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Basically here’s a brief timeline of my autism disorder (or disease)

  • I didn’t start talking till I was about 4
  • I struggled through my middle school years (and left the school district within a couple months)
  • I had gotten severely agressive from when I was 12 to before 18 (which I don’t know what causes it for everyone on the spectrum, but disturbing even to this day)
  • I described myself as being 3 years behind most peers, up till when I turned 21 and fell off the cliff,
  • The last 3 years was the worst years of my life however,
  • I moved to a new town for the first time ever in my life in the last year in and a happier area if I can try to get out and stay in this region

Even with the happier news of my life, there is still some bumpy roads. I seem to be “regressing” since finishing school, to the point where I am getting agressive again. People close to me are concerned, and they should feel that way. I don’t know why I would be so angry…oh wait – because I have had a difficult life!
I feel I have other disorders lumped into my existing disorder, but I don’t know if I am really on the spectrum or not. How can the disorder be so different for everyone that has it? I feel sometimes creeped out in my own skin, and rightfully so.  It’s like how can you be developmentally behind, but yet freak out like you should be put into a mental institution and also be somewhat smart?
That’s what I think about on an often basis, how can someone on the autism spectrum have a whole range of problems mixed into one individual?
Its never more confusing to struggle with this disorder/disease in these crazy times.
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Quick introduction

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My name is Steven, I am 23 years old. I’m on the autism spectrum disorder and I have been dealing/struggling with the disorder for my entire life. I have had a difficult life, but I always try to look at the bright side. This blog won’t be entirely my diary/journal, but to journalize the ever so growing number of autism and how the numbers of it don’t add up from someone who has autism
It was only just a few years ago the disorder hogged every media outlet, ether was a lead story or done specials. It didn’t matter if it was a cable news channel or on the web. Now as we go into the teens, the disorders of the 1990s are coming back. Bipolar disorder, Down’s Syndrome, Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder or ADHD or Asperger Syndrome. Guess witch disorder has been forgotten in the mainstream media or anywhere else? You guess it, Autism. It got media play just within the last week after the decade long saga if the MMR vaccination was to be blamed for autism. And some of the opinons were not very pretty. Autism is now getting beaten up again, and its just devastating.
I know that this blog can come off as anonymous, but the information that is posted are expected to be an opinion of an autistic that has a high school diploma (allegedly.) I felt it wasn’t worth it with the work I could had done to really earn it.
There aren’t that many voices that speaks about autism from anyone who has the traditional autism, the borderline pervasive developmental disorder/not otherwise specified or PDD-NOS. Many of the voices are women of a certain age and status ranging from middle aged mothers, or ones who work in special education or special needs sector. And most of these women are often liberal and voting a certain party in because the certain party is always [allegedly] for special education or special needs.
Because I lost my innocence at a young age, I have been skeptical ever since. Even if my end of the autism bubble* was truly a legitimate issue, I (and many others) seem to be skeptical of the current number of cases of autism that were born way after me. There is so much bad publicity, and there is a lot of people in the society that thinks that only people who are really crippled should be the only disabled people.
* Bubble – self profilled prophecy (i.e. the dot-com bubble of the late 90s where the Internet stocks were overpriced without any fundamental comparison.
There is much more to discuss, this is a tip of an enormous iceberg.
If no one else with the “real” autism is going to break their silence, I won’t be afraid to speak my mind in my own forum. This blog is the only place where I can express my 1st Amendment on what I think of my own disorder (or disease.)
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