Category Archives: 2022: #OutspokenAutistic (April ’22 – Present)

This could vary from literally being post-hopelessness or regressing backwards during the day. The former is the aspiring, but the former always creeps in. Like with any disability, an “invisible” one is an ongoing challenge, under reported, undervalued, and worse underappreciated. Also talks about recovering from narcissistic abuse is discussed in detail.

#TransformationTuesday: “Community Based Supports” = Out of Bathwater Services

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As part of adding justa little more time on this blog, to help layman people what people like me exist and why we are out, since I am interested in policy and understanding governance, I feel like I should be the one that can try to help out to extract the jargon to more understandable (or sometimes politically incorrect phrases).

I feel for my peers who can’t really speak for themselves with the force feeding of HCBS… ahem OBS

Since the 1990s, the state had supported adults with intellectual disabilities home & community based supports also known as HCBS in the so-called “advocates” and other related groups.

The services unlike in special education, where one was most likely secluded in an out of district program as the worse case, the individual in this situation would be in the community for a measurable 30 hours a week. The theory – that is by having an active person with a disability in the community would being inclusion and tolerance. The “Out of Bathwater Services” or OBS as I will rename this can be an emotional burden to the individual or support staff. The reason why I say “out of bathwater” is because it’s taking people into uncomfortable and often unforgiving places even in 2024; a lot of this force began ten years ago to be implemented right as COVID brought mass infections in 2020, the regulations put a deadline.

“feeling like I am walking on a four sided Plexiglass telephone booth where I can see things and not touch it.” ironically the plexiglass metaphor couldn’t be so literal after COVID just five years after I mentioned this

Part of these regulations also forced a “code of ethics” for the direct support professionals, known to the people as DSPs and the power structures that would change to make the DSP be extremely Swiss or have sudden strict boundaries. This can make or break an individuals mature experience in society.

From ASAN, the Autistic Self Absorbed Network, to our trio of activism, question the effectively of being out in the community literally for 6 hours a day assuming you’re going to have a job. What if you don’t? What if you don’t have money to shop or eat out food?

In fact the push of OBS was one of the reasons I fought against it, the creation of the Hopeless Autistic was my written accounts of what I had already seen in SPED a decade before. It was the most literal example of Read the F-cking Manual and interpret it yourself, and be sure you  understand it properly to avoid a non-compliance fine.

I went so far to explain my experience to several seasoned professionals at DHHS “feeling like I am walking on a four sided Plexiglass telephone booth where I can see things and not touch it.” ironically the plexiglass metaphor couldn’t be so literal after COVID just five years after I mentioned this. COVID delayed this forced feeding of OBS at least another two years because the pandemic, but since late 2022, things are “back to normal”.

And back to normal of walking around as if one is socially isolated with a group of people and getting conflicting messages whether to be part of it or stay isolated. I feel for my peers who can’t really speak for themselves with the force feeding of HCBS… ahem OBS

Editorial: Kelly Ayotte is an Existential Threat to the Granite State (Abbreviated Post)

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In less than six weeks (my next haircut happens on the day before) Election Day; I have considered if I should risk my life, family and reputation to call out an alarming concern if things specifically happen on Election Day, our state will never be the same. I have waited until I felt it was the right time to call out in fairness  to verify Kelly Ayotte’s dangerous political rhetoric she has done well before she registered to run for governor this spring.

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Please Visit the New Hampshire State House by January…

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I rarely go into politics compared to the past, however I want to say if you are into houses of local government, I suggest you visit the New Hampshire State House (this is the proper spelling by the way) before the end of the calendar year. At the rate for the race for the CEO with the least amount of executive power compared to the other 49 states with over 4 and a 1/2 million dollars in the campaign, certain responsibilities will rise to the most vulernable, and some others will get more “freedom”.

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Stay Work Play NH has a New Director (They Should’ve Shut Down Instead)

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When I was up north, I wasn’t totally disconnected to local news, The Conway Daily Sun, got the scoop that Stay Work Play, the tax evading organization masking as a “non profit” has a new director. Judging by the headshot, the Millennial aged punk looks sinister, seems to have skeletons and dead bodies in the basement, as many millennial are known to backstab to get to the top.

I chewed up Stay Work Play in the past I am not sure what social media account, but I have been highly skeptical of this group for years.

How much as Stay Work Play recruited so-called “young professionals” back home? These people are the most obscene groups to be in the Granite State. These people use the r-word while they celebrate Black & Brown people and the queer community. These “young professionals” (the very few I have encounters with) are 24x7x365 hustlers (because so many are atheists so they don’t celebrate traditional holidays), they will walk over you while they jump to the top. They steal buzzwords they have no clue just to be the corner-office boss biach or ahole if you’re a male. Many of these people are anti American types (meaning they really like more global approaches, they can’t speak in US English anymore other than ending emails with “Best”… how diid these people graduate High School?

The underling issue with many of these born after 1981 to 1995, is they are stunted at college age, as so many are in their mid to late thirties. These people admire their content-based learning, where they their super narrow minded interest they studied for six years; but if we had a “special interest” said phrase was to be used as a slur and to be weaponized.

Is this an overgeneralization? Perhaps, but I have not really had much faith of these supreme narcissists the Boomers pushed out. Of the over than 100 milliton American Millennials, I go so far to say 80% should’ve been sent to the local abortion clinic’s trash can! Of these accidental consequences, if the “red pill” was right, the birth crisis really began 40 years ago, because the Millennials are doing what the Boomers should’ve done in the first place (not having kids.)

But if I had my world, Stay Work Play (again, three verbs as a name of an organization, sure seems “commanding” in the language structure) the Attorney General would investigate their tax-evading status and backpay the State of New Hampshire for the amount of time Stay Work Play didn’t contribute as a non profit as if they were Enron. And whoever is behind the accounting should be jailed and have felony rap sheet. (and if you know me well, I remember the days when the “Crooked ‘E'” really painted a broad brush of white collared crime, behind the Financial Crisis.)

Fair Disclosure the person from an “ABA organization” I referenced to as a source on the theme of “activism” , that individual is an ad-hoc member as a corporate officer type. That individual I have severe professional disagreements with ASD related to the Granite State. So my wounds from the trauma of these badasses keep inflaming.

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Incels attacking Women, Feminism is Under Attack = We Can’t Probe Feminism Ever again

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After Labor Day, Elon Musk’s hyper obsession of manhood has stooped to an all time low. He reacted on his platform, X, formerly known as Twitter from some “autistic” interest account saying the top men should be running the country. As a result of this, the now repost had “interesting” as his remark.

What Musk is implying only men, who make money, own property (which could include women again at the rate of anti-feminism) and is a father of children to be the only ones elected to office or be a CEO.

But that isn’t the low; his obsession to procreation had set to another low, the stuff exclusive to the so-called “manosphere” or the “Red Pill” is yet again becoming mainstream.  Last week, he suggested he could give pop singer Taylor Swift a child and he, as a protector could provide her family and protect her cat.

I help report this, what do I get in return? Someone whose obsessed about something being triggered by algos where I had seek it not the other way around.

Is 3l0n trying to incite forced-procreation against Taylor?

Then on Sunday former President Donald Trump posted a Truth on Truth Social that “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT”

To be fair, I am not a TS fan by any means, I am not a post 1990s Country Music fan, I love country from the 1980s and before. You cannot force me to listen to WOKQ or WKLB, unless I kill myself first. Even when I was capturing Carolyn’ Kruse’s last air day in late August with a potential upload to YouTube, I tried to ignore what was on WKLB’s air.

However Taylor Swift is a successful artist, objectively speaking as the alpha-Chads would say. Could Taylor procreate as a mother of children? Sure, would she be a great “mom”? I’d prefer to wait that out

These men, ranging as old as Donald Trump to even other bleach-blond commentators like Megyn Kelly are extremely primitive. Women are supposed to be puppets controlled by their masters (the men) and their careers should occur after their prime age to make tons of babies to populate the planet.

The obsession on so-called “evolution psychology” is just pathetic, and sick. When I see a cute college age girl, or someone in their late 20s, I’m like she could make cute offsprings but would I go so far to say “hey lets hook up so I can make you babies”? I think I would be charged of rape. The issue is men, have been obsessed about procreation before this became mainstream. The issue is how it’s just being said casually to an audience that is bigger than the Big 3 TV networks combined, with no editorial standards or legal practices. Anything can go without any responsibility from Mr. Lisa Tom Blieyu, to Christopher Williamson to The Diary of a CEO.  The FCC doesn’t license podcasters but they won’t have to worry about equipment seized by the Feds.

Taylor Swift’s life has been threatened one too many times. Let’s talk about toxic femininity, how women are acting extremely nasty, as bad how narcissistic men once were. Gender needs to stop having political attitudes and resolve the gender gap through better leadership in business, media and society rather than regulate it through a tyranny. I think the current wave of feminism will lead to a complete destruction, but does that make me an anti-feminist? of course not!

Are Activists Missing Something?

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Earlier this evening, I was talking to the ol woman, and while I was waiting for our Domino’s order to arrive, I caught her up with the Zoom call with my therapist and mentioned the “political piñata”  and she mention how some people have an Utopian world view of black and brown people, disabled and women would be included in some dreamy way.

But I said something “why is.. it the people in crutches and wheelchairs?”

I understand that the physically impaired people had it really hard, and there is still improvements, but why are they having the cake and eating it too, while the invisibly disabled people are continuously not being “seen”?

In lots of these social justice movements, there is lots of hands up, or lifting up people, but it really begs the question, do they really want to be lifted or are they being propped up for one’s own political gain? Are these activists missing something here? Is there a PR issue with the messaging of their medium?

Also what the hell is “developmental disabilities” in 2024? Are many of these people just being lumped into the physically handicapped or the other way around via other types of dual- diagnosis?

When one really thinks about it, since the Civil Rights movements in the 1960s, we are in the situation where disability rights took much longer, but the disabled groups are broken into two, but the only one that is seen is the one that is more “obvious” and the more subtle, the nerodivergent type is not just singled out implicitly, they are completely shutting us out.

As a really strange example, how would say women feel if they were trying to be seen and the Black community tried to silence them in the 60s? For the present developmental delay that is impacting 1 in 30 people mostly males, and often more vilified than ever before, and with institutional experience of other civil rights movements in the past – why are people like me intentionally singled out, worse blacklisted, worse in a clown filter in the electronic world?

I am the rarity where I don’t use it as my identity but I am so hurt how when the identity is seen to many others as appropriate use, many others use it to shun. Why are we doing this?

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Moving to the Shadows (The Mountain Region)

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As promised a couple weeks back, I was going to start a series entitled Moving to the Shadows based on my own experiences of attempting to get out of Southern New Hampshire for a number of reasons, would bring more “hope”. If staying in the Granite State is a must, the best bet is to move to the border regions and into the “shadows”. The two most empathic states per to a Google search was Maine and Vermont, ironically the two least favorite states by me, Connecticut being the first when taking New Hampshire out of the equation, followed by Massachusetts and Rhode Island. Maine or Vermont doesn’t woo me, when I was a kid I chanted “I DON’T WANT TO GO TO FARMER-VERMONT!” Turns out, I wasn’t wrong.

Would I benefit? is there better “supports” in the “community”? Is this the coded messages that the Concord yakkers imply?

I wanted to be methodological if this was to happen. I have written about this before, but things have changed in my life which could cause different outcomes. Reminder, most of this is talking about relocating from an autistic who feels “hopeless”, If you want a typical view of what it’s like to visit the region, read towards the end. I did extensive research and still have an informal plan if I were to go forward with this (spoiler alert: it’s gonna happen.)

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DSP Awards…(More Politiziation)

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In about an hour (checks the Apple Watch), the Direct Support Professional Awards will be held at the State House Lawn. In the past, it would be held somewhere else. But for all those summer lovin’ folks, you’ll be happy, it will probably be in the 70s with abundant sun in downtown Concord.

But I wonder if this is dog-whistles of forced “community based” environment by supporting support professionals literally out in the community? Moreover, are they trying to send a political message to the Governor’s office and/or any General Court lawmaker who could be near the premises?

Pushing people out into the wilderness known as society, in the community – for some people with disabilities is just asking for trouble. For me I have had a record of bad experiences on my own, mind you. I wonder if the organizers are choosing to turn a blind eye to what could be going on with the clients, waiting, waiting, and waiting for their next activity or that some DSPs tend to get free time for errands by having a client tag along with them? Or how some clients are not really allowed to do anything they want, but are “challenged” or “persuaded” to do something different?

I just coincidentally came to age as the system got progressively worse, from the early 1990s to I’d say 2015; it was extremely agressive in a really regressive manner, the trauma of the 3 months in the so-called “traditional day services” was a problem, but seeing the full turnkey to “[fully and all the time being in] Community Based Supports” has been in ingredient for disaster, that no activist group or agency has admitted publicly how bad some of this “implementation” has been. Disability rights has gotten so politicized in the last 15 years. Who benefits? The “adults” in the room who are extremely immature.

What’s the difference between a DSP and someone in show business? Not much, both require massive amounts of ego. And if you’re allergic to ego, well appreciate that you haven’t died yet from all the reckless rhetoric from these people

Why I “Broadcast” Self-Desperation and how people cover their a-es

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In September of last year, I reached out to a former day program manager’s personal iPhone number who was at that point considered to be a natural support. That individual ghosted-me and never had contact with me. After leaving a message of the tone described in the video, and a year went by after the two unit police welfare check… I realized what really happened.

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