Tag Archives: Autism

Reflections of September 11th, 2001

Posted on by
Reply

September 11th, 2001 was one of the worst day the country had experienced. I would have to echo the same. I am going to keep this post to the point, but also be thoughtful.

1997
I went by New York City in 1997 when I went to New Jersey when my mother and her then boyfriend drove through The Bronx and Manhattan. We were going to Six Flags before the Western Mass one would open 3 or so years after. I remember when we tried to get back home (before that, we stopped at my aunts place in Connecticut) we took the wrong way and got off the GWB in Manhattan and I vaguely remember 5th Avenue, and for some reason I remember seeing the Statue of Liberty (however we were in Midtown, so I don’t know if that is true or not.)
2000
I did set foot a few years later on Labor Day weekend of 2000. I was in the whole Wall Street kick back then (and somewhat today even now I believe most of it is rigged.) We also went to Ellis Island and walked around the Statue of Liberty, although we didn’t go in there. I remember seeing the Twin Towers from the distance.
2001
On April Vacation of 2001, my mother and I went to Manhattan ourselves (we managed to get into The City courtesy of my aunt who lived at the time in the Tristate side of Connecticut during the several times we went there where we took the Metro North Rail into Grand Central.
My mother and I got tickets to see the Opening Bell of the start of the trading session at the New York Stock Exchange. However we missed it by a group or two. Regardless, I remembered seeing how dark the Exchange looked like without the magic of spotlights underneath the robotic camera lenses for the news organizations. The floor wasn’t that littered, since it was just past 9:30.  The next stop was we went into the World Trade Center into the lobby and trying to get to the Observation Deck. However with the deal-savy mother I have, there was a deal to go to all the three big skyscrapers (WTC, the Empire State Building and I forgot the 3rd.) Since we wanted to be more prepared we decided to do it another time.
That’s a true definition that there would not be another time.
When we went north into Midtown, after visiting the Nasdaq Marketsite, we noticed unusual security that was invasive at that time. (It was kinda like the post 9/11 security at that time, but only a few months before.) My mother and I were trying to figure it out when we went to lunch after.
Summer 2001
However, the story gets a bit heartbreaking for me. On the 4th of July week, my mother and I took a vacation to California to San Diego specifically Legoland. It was the first time I gone that far west in my lifetime. I remember how relaxed that week was. On our way back home, we had the plane almost to ourselves since people didn’t show up for their flights out of San Diego. We did land in Ohio before coming back to Manchester, which all I can remember we got home within the hour after the landing. For some reason I was very surprised that we were in and out. I also remember not having any jet lag (since jet lag happens when your body clock advances time.) I apparently adapted back to the Eastern Time very quickly.
You can the thought that I could had been a victim of that day since it was a couple months prior to the attack and one of those impacts was going cross country. That thought came to me a while after.
Labor Day Weekend 2001  Less than 2 weeks prior to September 11th
The next big trip was back to the NY/Tristate area that Labor Day weekend. My aunt was at the time dating a guy that worked for a large trading floor in Fairfield County, Connecticut. I was lucky that I got there in time to meet him and see the large floor with countless Bloomberg Terminals (boy was that fun!) Sun workstations, and everything else. However, that floor is a secured environment and he had to use his card to have the elevator go there and there was a security turnstall there as well. (Remember this was late August of 2001, just more than a week away from 9/11.)
We went to Manhattan the next day. My aunt didn’t want to go downtown for the reason that it being a warm, hot day that (allegedly) they do rolling blackouts on the subways which would get people stuck in the trains. I later believed it was likely an excuse to not go there. I never was able to see the complex that day.
I got the local tabloids on September 1st of that year and the stories of that day. It seemed to be a typical summer stories since after all it was Labor Day weekend.
September 11th, 2001
I remember the morning of 9/11 very vividly. I remember the morning’s stories, the economy was in the fritz for recession, the Chandra Levy love affair story (which I myself got hooked into) and anything else. I left to go to school at about 8:20. The school I was in was kind of a tough school, where lets be honest, where I couldn’t be the boss, or learn or do things that interests me, etc. I figured given their attitude to their students, that they kept zip quiet. No one mentioned anything to us till one of my staff came into the classroom at probably 10:30 and broke the news to us.
Honestly, I froze. When I heard of the World Trade Center, I thought of the Boston WTC since everything was slow for me to process. When I heard about planes flying around, I thought they were flying around the Eastern Rockingham County area. Because my staff was talking slow and I was trying to get answers in a spiffy manner, and after I thought or the mention of the Twin Towers, my soul immediately went into shock. This news came to me about the time after my mother called the school to ask if they had said anything to tell him since was there just in the last week. The school never dismissed us ether, probably since they thought it was a no-news for every other kid in the school and it wouldnt be important to them or whatever.
Trying to go onto any online source came up with an Error 404 since everyone was trying to get stories. The Internet experienced one of the most busiest days since by that time the Web became a serious medium of news, especially with the dynamic updates the sites could support. When I got home, I was watching every channel for their different reports.  And the era of the Big Media, most of the big media properties were sisters to the Big 3 Networks or cable news entities. Some did go off air to redirect viewers to their news outlets. And the radio markets I live in did the same thing wall to wall, and most of the local radio stations were brother stations to the all-news station or the talk radio station.
Post 9/11
I did go to The City 2 more times after, ether February or April Vacation and another Labor Day weekend with my mother as we strolled around Central Park and got a tour of NBC’s 30 Rock operations,etc. I also went to D.C. that following 4th of July and saw the side of the Pentagon that was getting ready to go back for business. My mother and I also went into the Monument that summer as well. I won’t ever forget that.
However post 9/11 was a different world. It changed my view of what America used to be and how the new America isn’t what I like.  I was 14 going on 11 (read a young 14 yead old) so my remaining innocence disappeared.   I would then go and spend the rest of my high school career in Massachusetts, a state known for its far anti American liberalism, where I saw my school take away the Pledge of Allegiance in only a few months. The work around was to do it by ourselves without the help of the paging of our phone system.  A few years prior to Obama being elected, a gut was telling me that someone needed to show more love to this country. That was also the same time I went to more sporting events.  I had felt more proud when I would hear the National Anthem, I felt like it was something missing for quite a while.
There were 3,000 lives that were gone in the 3 locations that day and its very sad to see people dying from the worst kinds of disater to happen. However they did luck out. It could had been a lot worse. I remember hearing from Neil Cavuto last September 10th mentioning there was a late game in The Bronx that the Yankees went to almost midnight, and some people were going to sleep in and go to work about 9:00 the latest. Also I will remember that it was a nice, late summer day. Many people ether took the day off, or went on vacation or whatever else. The complex would hold a daytime population of 50,000.
It was a very sad day on Sunday. I remember just being quiet and just having a sad look. I did have that sick feeling to my tummy on Thursday and Friday but I felt probably shocked. I felt the towers falling down was not only people gone but the country was we knew it. I don’t like how its been changed today, because I think the attacks created a new generation of people and all that crazy Wall Street stuff that got into that mess in 2008 probably took off after that in my observation. The City got more European thanks to the countless elections of Micheal Bloomberg. I have seen in pictures how yuppie it has looked. All those white painted lofts with simple looking office spaces and people with yuppie looks. I don’t remember that being the whole look of New York.
I won’t ever forget that day. It impacted me in so many ways as you have just read.

You know when you are in love…

Posted on by
Reply

when its not “meant to be”.

My hopes for ANY romantic relationships have been severely downgraded to likely to hopefully to hopeful to desperate to severely desperate to to hopeless. It doesn’t help when they all fall into the same damn theme known as crushes or infatuations. It doesn’t help when they are girls that are taken and it also doesn’t help that twentysomething bitches still act like they began puberty a decade before.

It also doesn’t help when ones mother “can feel” for one, when she has the power to act like a leader and try to date for a change. Oh wait, she don’t like change ether.
If you wonder why I have such low self of esteem or standards, it goes back to the grownups in my previous life not acting like real grownups. There has been NO strong leadership in my life in the recent years which makes things not so promising.

Rest in Peace Mark Haines, part three

Posted on by
Reply

I don’t often talk (or gloat) about my blog’s statistics, hits or views, because to me – its private information. I do want to mention at about 8:00pm Eastern, that I have received 150 views today. This is beyond an intraday record, since this blog often traffics on average of 20 views a day.
Every view today was linking the first two posts of the former CNBC Squawk Box anchor. The most interesting part most of the search terms outside of the generics, was specifically, autism, Autism Speaks, if “mark haines was autistic” and search phrases of his kids with autism in different terms.
I can’t confirm of how Mark Haines has a connection to the disorder, other than other CNBC talent have supported the questionable organization founded by ex NBC Universal president Bob Wright. I’m not sure if his one of his kids has the disorder, or a family member or was close to Bob & Suzanne Wright. I didn’t see the donations in lieu of flowers for Autism Speaks till I went on his memorial page on markhaines.cnbc.com this morning, and throughout the CNBC business day, they did mention the donations.
It through me off guard. The original post was just a few blurbs of someone that has autism who followed Wall Street and the markets mostly in stocks since I was about 12 or 13, with specific memories of the Squawk Box.  The snappy graphics, the theme package they used during the late 90s (it had the pre-game feel too) and the goofiness between the gang and Maria Bartiromo’s more humbler days of her walking up and down the NYSE trading floor getting the most up to date news before the bell.
In anyway, I wanted to post some of what traffic that came onto this blog and how surprised what results I was going to get other than a business newsman passed, not to know that people were searching for ASD along with the former newsman.
*
P.S. I finally spelled Squawk Box right for the first time after all these years that the show was named after the speakerphone adjunct that the traders would dial in and hear the morning’s calls of what hot stocks to buy and the ones that weren’t so hot. That’s where the name came from 🙂

I can never be happy

Posted on by
1

Even when I get told to do whatever makes me happy. It goes back to the f****d up school system in a border community in Southern NH and a fucked up school program in MA, when those retards told me I had to be flexible and think of others and “work with” them. Hell in fact one case manager had to instruct me to “kiss up” to the director who of which was violating laws protecting my rights! You heard that right, but I never (or ever) going to sue them because I always take the higher road.
Autism is just a goddamned fraud, do you know who works in this sector? A bunch of post menopausal HAGS!  Those creepy, motherly types. Those people that want those “young adults” to really be children. You never see a twentysomething tramp working in special needs for her rest of her life… because one they don’t know what the f*** is autism and second they are bunch of sluts that are drunk from vodka 99% of the time.
I don’t know if I can say this because its not P.C. but can the jooish smartasses just think about simplifying the disorder, instead of breaking it up into a bunch of pieces to the point its waaaayyy beyond the understanding?
But no, because it would degrade their $200 piece of paper from their Ivy League university with their obscene degeree with their obscene college loans and their obcscene salaries, etc. etc.
I like to see massive cuts in special education, cuts in administrative costs, DEREGULATE special education (yup that one is for you – MASSholes!) and so when these individuals turn 21, they won’t have that creepy feeling in themselves thanks to the moronic women teachers that make them that in the classroom.
Autism IS A FRAUD!

Commentary: Autism is NOT Aspergers

Posted on by
3

Asperger Syndrome is NOT autism! Autism is autism. Autism is a spectrum of severity of the disorder and a melting pot of disorders including developmental, neurological, mental and emotional disorders.
Why should Asperger’s be classifed as autism when they are functioning themselves? They can take care of themselves. They can drive, go to college and get a girl without any assistance.
These politics make autism a vague (read: alleged) and growing skeptism of the disorder when it keeps evolving, to use the phrase of the antichrist psychologist community.

Why I *hate* the University of New Hampshire

Posted on by
Reply

In light of the union hackerama brohaha at the University of New Hampshire, thats getting some hyperlocal media play, I thought I’d write a blurb or two about why UNH not only screws the taxpayers, but the most vulnerable people in this state.
First off, its only funded by the state for less than 2%. Why? Because in New Hampshire, we are known to spend the way of being frugal,  for the kids to get aid, the state puts a minimal amount to their budget. So the rest of the 98% is for other revenues, tuition, alumni, and other crap.
Another problem is the college’s way of not teaching practical skills for some of their practical studies. Most of the UNH kids major in partying than majoring in real subjects. And most of their programs do not apply to their state, i.e. Global Warming, and their globalization agenda – on the taxpayers dime! Also, many come here not from New Hampshire and the native graduates often  never come back to this state. And most of these bastards are from the rich families (i.e. snobs) and they often have an IQ bordering on room temperature regardless what education they previously had.
Oh and did I mention that their Institute on Disability that is a resource to the college for disabilities like autism, that is being taken advantage by the people who are really disabled? That department is for resource for the teaching studies, “professional development” but the resource is never used for the ones who can talk and attempt to learn in a college level.
As I tried to get results with one of the hack from UNH back last May in Bretton Woods, at the Family Support Conference, I told the hack that many people with ASD are turning 21 to find out they will be in limbo because there isn’t anything for them. I should told that guy also that UNH was asleep at the switch for not warning of the tsunami of the autistics turning 21 in the last and the next few years.  They could had done something, but they didn’t.
I hate UNH to death, and I have met only two decent people who went there and didn’t get their minds filled of goo.  One is a far rightie and one is leftist, so theres some true diveristy you don’t often hear at the Institution in Durham.
To partially steal the phrase from Michael Dell, if I ran UNH, I would give the money back to the taxpayers.

The stupid excuses of why we can’t be in love

Posted on by
Reply

The bureaucratic teachers will say to one that they aren’t a “dating service” when they know that 99.99% of the class is male. They can’t do anything beyond their job title, even it its less than a dozen responsibilities.
Harassment, and Sexual Harassment is hardwired into us because guess who would be headed to jail first? You guessed it – the ones on the spectrum!
I don’t know why stalking isn’t brought up to be lectured upon, I have read about those alleged “concerns” from the ones that make the spectrum worse than it should be.
The so called experts, (the one’s with those PhD degrees that specializes in just autism) have to break things into pieces so one on the spectrum can understand, in this case relationships. At some point, the pie will be sliced into so many thin slices, that making something understandable would make the problem worse. Again, there is a negative slant, is most cases about what not to, which always seems to the be “important” part.
Then I could go on and explain how most people with ASD cases are often forced to go to a work program from when they are 18 to their 21st birthday. It’s kinda like boot camp where you kiss your childhood goodbye and become a slave in the workforce, and some work programs you have to learn how to become a corporate slut like in the case of my ex-town, by working, working and working and be a whore to the VP just to make a killing salary.
Again just an opinion of someone who has just been screwed by a system that might had made up a disorder just to employ mothers for a full time job.

The stupid excuses of why we can’t be in love

Posted on by
Reply

The bureaucratic teachers will say to one that they aren’t a “dating service” when they know that 99.99% of the class is male. They can’t do anything beyond their job title, even it its less than a dozen responsibilities.
Harassment, and Sexual Harassment is hardwired into us because guess who would be headed to jail first? You guessed it – the ones on the spectrum!
I don’t know why stalking isn’t brought up to be lectured upon, I have read about those alleged “concerns” from the ones that make the spectrum worse than it should be.
The so called experts, (the one’s with those PhD degrees that specializes in just autism) have to break things into pieces so one on the spectrum can understand, in this case relationships. At some point, the pie will be sliced into so many thin slices, that making something understandable would make the problem worse. Again, there is a negative slant, is most cases about what not to, which always seems to the be “important” part.
Then I could go on and explain how most people with ASD cases are often forced to go to a work program from when they are 18 to their 21st birthday. It’s kinda like boot camp where you kiss your childhood goodbye and become a slave in the workforce, and some work programs you have to learn how to become a corporate slut like in the case of my ex-town, by working, working and working and be a whore to the VP just to make a killing salary.
Again just an opinion of someone who has just been screwed by a system that might had made up a disorder just to employ mothers for a full time job.

Why autistic people don’t fall in love.

Posted on by
Reply

Here’s my politically incorrect post about why people on that traditional autism spectrum disorder (ASD) do not fall in love.
Because we are told we can’t.
Well, not literraly. Most people who have high functioning autism (HFA), Asperger Syndrome (AS) or another scam disorder are male, most of them didn’t go to public school and most schools there are all male based (prolly 99% of them are.) And most of the teachers (probably of 90% majority) are female whom of which are under the age of 30 by most cases. Even if they are pretty, we obviously can’t date them. Even if you are a legal adult between the ages of 18 to 21 unfortunately.
We have been hardwired (read: bricked for a lack of a better techno word) about ethics, morals and respect. Also being forced to learn sex harassment and general harassment doesnt help matters because they tell us that  its “the law”
And most of us like older ladies because 99.9% of the girls under the age of 34 are the Gen X/Millennial/MeMeMe generation. They are just as snobby (and dare I say slutty) as their parents of their time. So basically I have never met a bitch I really liked. This isn’t your typical “phase” in ones life, this is worse. My remaining innocence went away when the MySpace, Facebook and other social mediums took over. This opened a window about these peer groups not at all promising.
That’s just a  tip of the iceberg.
I lived in upper class (forget upper middle class) in what was used to be a middle class/middle sized town of New Hampshire just less than 20 years ago. All the rich Andover, Mass. type of people had invaded and raped the entire Southern NH region and brought their booze, their slutty “little girls” and other shit over to our nice little town. Now the town I just left no less than 5 months ago has changed, just like that town changed in less than 2 years. There’s more and more bigger show off SUVs (I don’t have a problem with them, only when its for a show off purposes) in my town as with more condoms on the roadside, more and more beer bottles and more sluts living there.
I’ll refrain from that S-word for the rest of this post.
However, it brings massive substance because I was programmed to be careful with the opposite gender.  I don’t know why, likely the parents have to protect the girls because they are (allegedly) vulnerable in the statical sense. Whatever I’ve heard that reasoning (excuse) of why they are bitches, but protecting them for the safety sense should not the be Number 1 or Number 2 of why they can be bitches.
I do know one girl who really messed me up, but because she’s was that pretty little daddy’s girl, she could get away damaging one of the most vulernable people in the town. (again autistic and a boy – thats fine but the other way around, OMG – SCANDALOUS!!!) I almost forgot she was part of that UNH bubble, a worse target, because those people are even more s***ty, drunk and dare I say DUMB? And I pay a fraction of my tax dollars to fund some of those bitches? Why shut the whole damn place down and give that 2% back to the damned taxpayers?
I’m sorry for bitching and ranting, but obviously as one who has some form of autism (whatever the label is the fashion today) I feel somewhat hurt that I never kissed a girl or ever got into any relationship past an infatuation, but again its the damned hacks from the local teachers union that wants to create a w0man-made disorder just so they can take care of their kids even if they are well of age.
I’ve been getting over the pain, this February 14th wasn’t as painful, as I don’t feel as a hopeless romantic anymore, but a hopeless autistic instead.

Why autistic people don’t fall in love.

Posted on by
Reply

Here’s my politically incorrect post about why people on that traditional autism spectrum disorder (ASD) do not fall in love.
Because we are told we can’t.
Well, not literraly. Most people who have high functioning autism (HFA), Asperger Syndrome (AS) or another scam disorder are male, most of them didn’t go to public school and most schools there are all male based (prolly 99% of them are.) And most of the teachers (probably of 90% majority) are female whom of which are under the age of 30 by most cases. Even if they are pretty, we obviously can’t date them. Even if you are a legal adult between the ages of 18 to 21 unfortunately.
We have been hardwired (read: bricked for a lack of a better techno word) about ethics, morals and respect. Also being forced to learn sex harassment and general harassment doesnt help matters because they tell us that  its “the law”
And most of us like older ladies because 99.9% of the girls under the age of 34 are the Gen X/Millennial/MeMeMe generation. They are just as snobby (and dare I say slutty) as their parents of their time. So basically I have never met a bitch I really liked. This isn’t your typical “phase” in ones life, this is worse. My remaining innocence went away when the MySpace, Facebook and other social mediums took over. This opened a window about these peer groups not at all promising.
That’s just a  tip of the iceberg.
I lived in upper class (forget upper middle class) in what was used to be a middle class/middle sized town of New Hampshire just less than 20 years ago. All the rich Andover, Mass. type of people had invaded and raped the entire Southern NH region and brought their booze, their slutty “little girls” and other shit over to our nice little town. Now the town I just left no less than 5 months ago has changed, just like that town changed in less than 2 years. There’s more and more bigger show off SUVs (I don’t have a problem with them, only when its for a show off purposes) in my town as with more condoms on the roadside, more and more beer bottles and more sluts living there.
I’ll refrain from that S-word for the rest of this post.
However, it brings massive substance because I was programmed to be careful with the opposite gender.  I don’t know why, likely the parents have to protect the girls because they are (allegedly) vulnerable in the statical sense. Whatever I’ve heard that reasoning (excuse) of why they are bitches, but protecting them for the safety sense should not the be Number 1 or Number 2 of why they can be bitches.
I do know one girl who really messed me up, but because she’s was that pretty little daddy’s girl, she could get away damaging one of the most vulernable people in the town. (again autistic and a boy – thats fine but the other way around, OMG – SCANDALOUS!!!) I almost forgot she was part of that UNH bubble, a worse target, because those people are even more s***ty, drunk and dare I say DUMB? And I pay a fraction of my tax dollars to fund some of those bitches? Why shut the whole damn place down and give that 2% back to the damned taxpayers?
I’m sorry for bitching and ranting, but obviously as one who has some form of autism (whatever the label is the fashion today) I feel somewhat hurt that I never kissed a girl or ever got into any relationship past an infatuation, but again its the damned hacks from the local teachers union that wants to create a w0man-made disorder just so they can take care of their kids even if they are well of age.
I’ve been getting over the pain, this February 14th wasn’t as painful, as I don’t feel as a hopeless romantic anymore, but a hopeless autistic instead.